Humour

Let them get Facehooked

T A Balasubramanian on how social networks can get addictive

Bobo Jitter, the ever-anxious CIO of Bazooka Corporation, takes a closer look at what social networking sites like Facehook and MeowSpace could mean for his working life as he resumes a new session on Dr Don Jong’s couch this week. Dr Jong, fondly called The Oddfather, has a compulsive tendency to weave in audacious solutions to fix the testing conundrums that are thrown up with the march of technology.

“I was thinking back about what we discussed last week, Doc, about your son leading you to join MeowSpace. I trust you two have become habituated to having a Siamese cat at home?”

“Hmm, yes, my boy. It is indeed a matter of great excitement. We now have a blog called ‘Siamese Twins’—which I write along with my son. You should see the number of my colleagues from the psychiatrist fraternity who comment on it, not to mention the expressions of awe from the 150 teenagers from MeowSpace who belong to ‘Siamese Cat Hall’—imagine your son being your twin—we are now competing each day to make sure that we get equal blog time!”

“Well, Doc, I can see how social networks can be addictive.”

“Addictive? It is thrilling! You get to shape yourself in a new way in a new space, each time you get online. There’s nothing quite like having an adventure start off each day—you get to explore new worlds, add new experiences to your life, Bobo.”

“I see that you are a changed man, Doc. Charged with a new energy.”

“Well, thank you. However, it is not so much about changing who you are. It is about emphasizing different aspects of your personality. When you have an ever-growing network of people you can ‘hang’ out with and express yourself to in multiple ways, you have an incorrigible impulse to get creative. And according to Metcalfe’s law, which was formulated by Robert Metcalfe, the usefulness of a network zooms up in proportion to the square of the number of nodes—or people you know in the case of Facehook—attached to it. So a network of 40 people is not just twice as useful as a network of 20—it is four times as useful.”

“That’s fine, Doc. But how does one get all this explosion of casual networking to fit into the mainstream of business life? After all, the workplace is not for people to ‘hang out’ or lounge—which is, as I understand, the justification for the wild popularity of sites like Facehook and MeowSpace.”

“Agreed. These are not your usual suspects—the professional business word processors and spreadsheets that one would expect in the workplace.”

“But the question I would ask is—so why is everyone so interested in bringing in these new ‘social networking’ tools into the office? After all, employees ‘hanging around’ with peers and flaunting their multiple personalities can hardly be reassuring to a CIO, Doc. I need to show my credentials by aligning with business goals, and this is not exactly what my CEO would appreciate.”

“One moment, Bobo. Do you realize that there is a reason why we call it ‘social networking’? Like a friend told me at a mammoth gathering in a seminar last month—where we felt like two boats floating around in the open sea—there are more of us around and yet most of us feel stranger than ever as we spend more and more time with gadgets and gizmos. Of course, social networking tools will not fix our need for more human contact—but what if they can offer unexpected rewards from a business angle?”

“I cannot imagine what those rewards might be, Doc.”

“Well, let’s look at it from another angle. Why is it so hard to make users adopt any new software you introduce from the frosty heights of the IT corner of Bazooka?”

“They just do not like to change their ways, I suppose.”

“Ah, Bobo, you deflect my question too quickly from your doorstep! One of the reasons, I notice, is that sometimes the choice of software is made over the actual users’ heads. Often users have no budgets and little decision power, and that is why your pesky software vendors pitch to your CEO or to you, who make the final choice of software. Many experts agree that this fact is convenient for the IT departments, because they get as much control as possible over users. Is that right?”

“Of course we like to have more control, Doc. We can’t let the users have a free hand, hauling in their favorite programs. There would be chaos.”

“Chaos. Why do CIOs fear chaos so much? Now, maybe that is just another word for change, Bobo. Your users are not as wayward as they used to be. They are getting to be more sophisticated. All these social networks, blogs, wikis and other interactive technologies that they use at home helps them find similar tools for more effective work in the office. And soon enough, they find new ways to work together and collaborate without any help from your IT corner.”

“They do that all the time. It drives me crazy.”

“Of course it does—because you are resisting the inevitable tide. But what if you could turn it on the head and become, like your friend, Radar Rangaswami, an advocate of Facehook? What if the social buzz turns out to be more efficient? The favorite programs that your users want to haul in are freely available and designed with their needs in mind. Facehook group members can customize their collaborative space and make it specific to their own needs—because it is easy to do that.”

“You mean we make it open house for collaboration? Let every user create whatever she wants?”

“How easily you forget the past, Bobo! Do you recall a time when email was considered an oddity? But can you imagine anything else today that would make it possible to connect with many people as quickly as email?”

“I get the drift. So, in deference to history, I sit back and let social networking tools be the next wave that sweeps me off my seat?”

“Ah, do I see the resistance here? But just think—if there is a simple way that they can be themselves, then your users will do everything to adopt it. For example, blogging is a marvel of simplicity that makes self-expression effortless. To blog, all you need to do is write a title and, throw in some content, and then click to publish. It is that simple to share your ideas with the rest of the team and get their feedback in the comments. Who would not fall for it?”

“I see the light, Doc. Let a million Facehooks bloom in Bazooka, come what may.”

“Voila, you comprehend! And to ease your anxiety, let me tell you a tale. There once was a college that made place for a new grassy area that lay between several of its buildings. Instead of laying down paved paths on the grass, the college did nothing, so as students walked between buildings, sand paths naturally started to show up. After two months, the college paved the sand paths. A year later, the grassy area still looked great—with no sandy foot marks and paved only where it was needed.”